dancing through life

You've got to get on making your own 'krau...

2012-05-16T10:43:31.690-04:00

You've got to get on making your own 'kraut- it's a real game changer ;).

Salad looks great, Ashley!

They look AMAZING!!!

2012-05-09T16:20:47.552-04:00

They look AMAZING!!!

Just recently (ie. an hour ago) started reading yo...

2012-04-27T13:57:57.976-04:00

Just recently (ie. an hour ago) started reading your blog and I can't stop. I'm addicted.
I'm no stranger to having various (I think I'm up to 9 now in Toronto) doctors poke and prod at my girly parts - I literally had 4 vaginal exams in one month at one point. I so appreciate your reliability and candidness.
Can't wait to keep reading :)

Aw looks like you had a blast! x :o)

2012-04-12T04:10:46.897-04:00

Aw looks like you had a blast! x :o)

I needed to read a post like this today. Thanks fo...

2012-04-05T16:47:51.732-04:00

I needed to read a post like this today. Thanks for sharing! xo

Definitely understand the hard decision, but you d...

2012-03-26T23:22:15.363-04:00

Definitely understand the hard decision, but you did what you had to do for Ashley - and I'm glad you were able to make the decision. The last thing I would want is for you to keep doing this just because.

You have been such an amazing leader over the years that although you won't be in the meetings, you have changed SO many lives and left an impact on SO many people that will stick with them for a long time.

I will always remember our time in "old-school" leader training, that first day was not only a day where I was going to learn to become a leader, I ended up meeting the most amazing girl in the world! You and I shared lots of laughs and stuff throughout that time and I remember the promise we made each other. I'm really glad you're taking the time for YOU.

It was tough for me to make the decision I did for giving up my Wednesday class, but I am glad I did. It was also tough to decide to leave the YMCA but I know it's the best decision and once it's done I will realize after a couple of weeks it was the best.

*hugs*
you're awesome :)

From one former leader to another, I feel your pai...

2012-03-26T17:46:27.941-04:00

From one former leader to another, I feel your pain. I know all too well the need for more "me" time. You will be missed, my dear, but I can't wait to see what you do next! :)

Was time my sweet.

2012-03-26T17:43:50.694-04:00

Was time my sweet.

Well, if you ever find yourself waking up on a Sat...

2012-03-25T21:07:51.808-04:00

Well, if you ever find yourself waking up on a Saturday morning with nowhere to go....parachute into our meeting (where you can see me rock my new size 6 jeans!!!!). We had a great first meeting with Tracy but there is no doubt that there will always be a little Ashley-shaped hole in our meetings.

You were my favourite leader Ash! No one else coul...

2012-03-22T06:11:36.626-04:00

You were my favourite leader Ash! No one else could have gotten me outta bed that early on a Saturday! Good luck with your future. I'm sure it will be amazing :)

all of this food looks so good! the bakery treats ...

2012-03-21T13:08:33.045-04:00

all of this food looks so good! the bakery treats especially!

I've not had an abnormal test but a friend of ...

2012-03-06T03:25:29.390-05:00

I've not had an abnormal test but a friend of mine commonly does and she was told that it's because she produces a higher than 'normal' level of mucus. We did some research into this and found that there is very little to define what is a 'normal' level of mucus vs. what is not.

Ultimately I think it's about having a good doctor who can provide you with detailed information. I've spent years trying to find a doctor who I really trust with my pap test. I've only had one who was really good and could explain everything to me in a way which I clearly understood.

I have been in your shoes before too Ash. I had 2 ...

2012-03-05T22:23:29.739-05:00

I have been in your shoes before too Ash. I had 2 years of abnormal results..5 pap tests in 2 years that were abnormal...abnormal but nothing to be concerned about. Turned out to be mild dyplasia and after a biopsy and 3 normal results after that, everything went back to normal..

Lindsay

It definitely seems like abnormal is the new norma...

2012-03-05T19:43:51.606-05:00

It definitely seems like abnormal is the new normal---I hadn't had a pap in several years (bad me!) due to moving around like crazy and also being lazy, but then I started hearing so many stories from girlfriends about abnormal paps and cervical cancer scares--one serious, most not, but still scary. So I finally got around to going to the doctor--and yep, something's odd in that area and I'm booked for a colposcopy in about two weeks. Crazy! Fingers crossed that all is fine--for you, for me, for everyone dealing with this stuff!

you described the experience more eloquently than ...

2012-03-05T11:24:17.426-05:00

you described the experience more eloquently than i could! i have gotten used to my situation and i deal with it as best i can, it's scary but you're absolutely right when you say we have strength in numbers. so many women suffer through this, that we are never alone in the fight. positive thoughts! love you, brave girl. xx

I've been there, sister-friend. More than 10 y...

2012-03-05T08:48:47.338-05:00

I've been there, sister-friend. More than 10 years ago, I had my first abnormal pap, ended up having to get a LEEP procedure on a couple of spots...due, probably to HPV. For a few years after that, I went every 6 months; now I'm back to once a year. All of my paps since then have been normal. So not a big deal that I hadn't really even thought about it until you brought it up.

Sadly, abnormal IS the new normal, so don't neglect your annual exam.

xoxoxoxo

I've had numerous abnormal and regular paps- s...

2012-03-05T08:40:36.808-05:00

I've had numerous abnormal and regular paps- some were abnormal due to clinician fail, meaning that the doctor got a poor sample, but others were as you described them. I've not had to go through the procedure as you have but agreed, so many women I know have that really, I'm almost expecting something along those lines on my next physical on the 20th. Which- get this- took me 9 months to book. Yes, 9 months to book a half hour physical here in Toronto with my regular GP of 14 years. Fingers crossed for your positive results. And I'll keep you posted as well!

At 28, I had to change doctors due to insurance. ...

2012-03-05T08:05:52.632-05:00

At 28, I had to change doctors due to insurance. Waited a bit longer than usual but when I went, came back 'abnormal'. Went again in 3 months, yep, 'abnormal'.
did the biopsy, stage 3 cervix cancer. Talk about life changing event.
Out went the cigarettes, diet coke, junk foods. Crappy boyfriends.
After chemo,and 80% cervix removal, I have been cancer free for 20 years. I married a great man, carried 2 strong, lovely boy babies to term, and have continued to have 'normal' pap smears.
When Gardasil was released, I begged all my sisters and sisters-in-law to inoculate their girls. Now, they are giving it to boys and both of mine have had it.
Keep following up Ashley! My oncologist jokes that if you are going to have cancer, cervical is the one to have. But if you don't take care of it, it WILL kill you.

What a great post, Ashley. As someone that has lo...

2012-02-28T13:05:41.595-05:00

What a great post, Ashley. As someone that has lost a parent, I understand those feeling that you have each year. Nothing can replace what is lost. I love your approach to moving forward and making your Mom smile down on you, wherever she is watching from.

This is an incredible blog. I have experience a lo...

2012-02-28T04:04:51.160-05:00

This is an incredible blog. I have experience a lot of death in my life compared to most people my age (27) and I'm baffled at how many people get to their fifties, sixties and seventies without learning the importance and necessity of grieving.

I have lost a friend to suicide and that experience in itself was difficult - I cannot even fathom losing a parent to it.

As someone who has battled mental illness I totally appreciate this post and what you are sharing.

Thank you!

Thank you for sharing your story. Your kind, gentl...

2012-02-27T16:20:55.841-05:00

Thank you for sharing your story. Your kind, gentle openness will help so many. Beautiful.

Wishing you much love

2012-02-25T07:29:55.690-05:00

Wishing you much love

Ashley: I think what you wrote is amazing, powerfu...

2012-02-24T20:13:49.721-05:00

Ashley: I think what you wrote is amazing, powerful, and your honesty heartfelt. I wish I had the words to respond... I don't, I go numb with questions, year after year... I miss and think of her often, and sometimes the questions I have are directed towards myself, if only x's 100... you held her, you prayed and she didn't come back... I often ask myself if only I said, or seen or did somethings different maybe she wouldn't have gone... during that time in your Mothers life she was with friends and doing things I didn't fancy being apart so like many other times we pulled away for awhile... I never thought it would be goodbye. For me it was the year I was planning my wedding to Tony, April 18 and even though it was a very special day in my life it was also a very sad and hard one I went down the aisle without my best friend at my side, but I know I had her blessing and like then and ever so often I feel her in my heart and your right I will allays feel special for knowing such a amazing person. In life your Mother taught me a lot, in her death I'm still learning... That it's ok to let go, yet look back, for my memories will last a lifetime. As I think of Debbie Gibson the women, I recall her strength, laughter and beauty... Debbie Gibson my best friend, I recall her loyally, honesty, and great sense of humor, and also she was a person who never feared trying new things and giving it her all, she was a free sprit who taught me to let go, have fun and trust myself.... Debbie Gibson the Mother, one of the best! she was loving, caring, supportive outgoing, active and involved, cool, and most of all proud! She lived life giving so much to others, but for some reason wasn't able to give with the same strength and confidence to herself. Ashley please know I'm so grateful to you for allowing me to share and view your life on Facebook, and know I'am amazed always with your accomplishments, talents and most of all you courage to truly shine in the light of life when so many people would have somehow got stuck in darkness. xoxox HUGS!!!!

Thinking of you Ashley - you continue to show stre...

2012-02-24T19:50:55.476-05:00

Thinking of you Ashley - you continue to show strength and vision, even when the view is bleak. Keep finding the joy you always have been able to uncover and create. xo Sara (aka Ms. D.) xoxo

As someone who recently went through the first yea...

2012-02-24T16:08:23.119-05:00

As someone who recently went through the first year of not having a mother, I can't imagine being 14 years in. I am so sorry. Beautiful post. So heartfelt and honest and real. Thank you for sharing it.
http://www.thedoseofreality.com/2012/02/15/being-motherless-reflections-after-a-year/